.....so much at times it hurts to breathe. I find myself LOST in thoughts of us, and some days TRYING to just find the strength to get through it. I know you will be home in the not so distant future, but the daily grind of being positive, and getting it ALL done by myself SUCKS. I am so PROUD of the man you are, and the INSPIRATION you are for our children, but my selfish side is angry that I have to give up MY time with you. Life is so short, that suddenly I feel like any MISSED day or opportunity might not ever come by again.
I want to NEVER feel this way while you are gone, but SOME DAYS are EASIER than OTHERS, and then some require a brown paper bag to catch my breath. Sweetheart, yesterday when you called you said "I feel better after talking to you." OMG that was one of those MOMENTS that MIGHT have slipped by unnoticed if you and I hadn't been on the phone.....just us. I love everything about you, and everything we are TOGETHER.
I will ALWAYS support whatever decision about your life you want to make, but its truly an HONOR for us to share those decisions TOGETHER. One day 17+ years ago, I met a young man in the amphitheater at Kent State University (its now gone) but it was there on that day looking up at your face, and realizing that you were...no you ARE the man I want to spend every moment of my life with. You were my HERO then and you are my HERO now. I know this deployment has its own "issues" for you (as well as us) but know that "right is right" and I support anything you do for that cause. I BELIEVE in you, and I know that you will find the strength to get through whatever crap you have too there, and honey I will keep this place running and waiting for you.
Happy Day Off today Shayne....I love you with every fiber of my being.
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