Springtime yet?

I am loving this weather...sorry all my SNOWED in friends to my North...but today I realized why I wanted to move to the South.

See photo below it explains it all.....

Today it was almost 70 degrees and sunny. We grilled out and had a small picnic. Its odd doing this stuff without Shayne, but we've learned that its just the way it is.

I know that its only about 2.5 weeks and we'll all we together but it seems like FOREVER still. I mean when is it gonna seem like this crap is finally over?

I have learned to enjoy my kids more than ever. They make me nuts and I can't wait for daddy to come home and deal with some of the stuff, but I have had so much fun just hanging out with them many of the days that Shayne's been gone.

I can hear in Shaynes voice on the phone that he's doing so much better, he's acutally beginning his check out procedures.....funny how when I want to pack a month before we go on vacation he looks at me nuts but now he's getting a taste of the resposibilites of the "check list to leave" LOL. Funny how its only a small taste...in a couple months I'll be doing it for 6 of us again. But I can't wait.

Anyway, we are holding our own, just very busy. Spring and the end of a deployment tend to do that to ya I guess. Hope this finds you well.

Its been awhile

I have been completely unfocused, and not wanting to write at all. Many things have happened since the Super Bowl. I got more depressed the closer we got the the 30 day mark which symbolically was the 14th of February...Well Happy Valentines day huh? I thought the longer this went on, the easier it would get. Not easier in the sense that I would be happy and smiling, and well NORMAL, but easier....IT DIDN'T. I found that Shayne and I were both more and more depressed with the entire situation. The sad thing for me is that he gets over it so much quicker than I do...I mean I dwell, and continue the downward spiral, he moves on. Maybe that's what men do I don't know.

I do know that today we SHOULD BE 28 days from the end of this deployment. Official papers will be available on Monday when he goes and gets them...HOPEFULLY. Funny how they send him an email to tell him he's leaving early, but won't email the letter to say you get to go home. Who knows, I have long since stopped trying to figure the military and what they are doing LOL.

So I have a MISSION...Oh my gosh ANOTHER one LOL. But I do really, I am gonna get back on SCHEDULE today if it kills me. I want my house cleaned before the little ones lay down for naps today...And they are LAYING DOWN LOL.

My dear KD is working hard on potty training, she is so excited everyday she talks to daddy to tell him she went to the potty and she's wearing Dora underwear LOL. Seth just wants dad to drive home LOL. He did tell me he couldn't fly home because he doesn't have wings. Little does he know Shayne is my Angel and he does have wings. We also celebrated the 5 months down mark with our traditional monthly cake, and my husband bought me and AMAZING Valentines Day gift...a Queen for a day package at a local Spa. I've driven by it, and its beautiful. I however added money too it and made it a couples package for US when he comes home. I'm pretty excited.

I love my life, but I will love it a LOT more in 28 days. Thanks for always reading, and commenting gang, its nice to read.

Its over....

...football season that is, and GO COLTS. It was a hard day to sit here and watch that game w/o Shayne, but we survived. He called during 3rd quarter, and it was nice to hear his voice.

I don't know how to get through some of these days, I mean he's been gone FOREVER now, its supposed to get easier but a friend of mine said "there's light at the end of the tunnel" which is true, but I can't reach the light. I feel like I'm running through fog, and I just can't breathe right.

I used to just pray for him to be safe, and to make it through to the end. Now I am back to begging God to make this go quicker....I NEED this to be over. I NEED him home to fix stuff, and hold me, and talk to me, and bitch about the bills, and hold me, oh yeah I said that LOL guess I miss that a lot tonight.

I hope that when this is over we find US again, and we don't find we are LOST. I don't want to be another casualty of this awful war. I want to just get back to some semblance of normal, and I want to smile again and feel it like I used too.