....these feelings I can't seem to shake. I miss my husband so much and today just sucked, so I miss him even more. Now when I say I hate the Navy, I don't really, I just hate it right now. I can't call him when I'm upset, and by the time he can call me I have found a way to adapt and deal...which is good, but I still hate this.
The other day my friend Peggie was talking about her husband leaving again after just getting home from 15+ months to be gone all summer, and my heart broke for her. Ya know that's how I feel, we just get used to it being how it is, and something else takes them a way. And yes I know "that's what they signed up for" and I'm fine with that, except when my heart is broken, and I feel like there is a cement block sitting on my chest while I TRY and breathe. And just for the record, I didn't marry the military, I'm supporting something that is so important to him and our family...yeah that's the serving our country pride thing we have going on.
I don't care if this is his job and what he signed up for I HATE this. I'll deal but I still HATE it. I am so PROUD of him that I smile just thinking about it, but I don't want to be separated anymore....I miss him, I need him to be here so WE can function TOGETHER. I don't want to plan another darn holiday with out him. But since that's not going to happen, I will find a way to "buck up" and deal. I can and have done it before, and I'll do it again. I just wanted to vent about my miserable feelings today.
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