My post today on Military Mom’s message board got me thinking. That I NEED to be more THANKFUL for what I have instead of sitting here mourning what I don’t. I mean I am LOST that my husband is gone. He truly is my heart, and the love of my life. I miss his handsome face, and the fact that he farts on my couch while I’m sitting in the same room. I even miss Bubba Burgers (that is so a story for another blog LOL). But I know that I can’t spend every waking moment LOST in my pain and frustration of having to be IN CHARGE. I have spent days worrying that I am doing the bills wrong, or not moving FRIEDA (that’s his beautiful RED MUSTANG) enough, and this morning when I woke I realized it DOESN’T matter if I’m doing it right, as long as the bills are paid on time, and the account isn’t overdrawn, then I’m ok. I know there’s a credit card for emergencies so I am truly fine. Today was probably the first day in a MONTH that I KNEW I was ok.
I missed shopping with him today, as he truly is a hoot. But I took the babies (well they are my babies at 2 and 3 yrs old) to McDonalds to play and they had a blast. I bought Seth a pair of Spiderman PJ pants because he is so into the SUPERHEROS. KD got a doll and she had to have Dora Underwear LOL. I then went and got Hubby a couple things for his upcoming boxes. I know that he’s not the easiest to buy for because he really doesn’t want ANYTHING but I feel better if I send stuff I think he needs…LOL So I got him some magazines he really wants, and got some more pictures of the kids and I have a video of my oldest sons football game to send him this week-end, as well as a PRESENT from me LOL no hints there gang sorry. But in a month he’ll have something to smile about too. So I went to the “GROWN UP GIRLS” store today…OMG I felt OLD…I didn’t realize ½ that stuff existed LOL. However Shayne if you’re reading this I did manage to spend a couple dollars…LOL.
I asked him the other night if he was TRULY ok, and to not just give me lip service. He told me it was a routine now, and except for missing me and the kids, he was ok. That it was only 23 more weeks (sounds much better than 162+ days doesn’t it LOL). I guess the only way to face this SEPERATION is head on, when I have the strength and when I don’t I need to cry a few minutes, take a nap and then start all over from a different angle. I love him and miss him horribly but today I am ok, which leaves me hope that maybe there will be MORE good days in the future. Until then I am just gonna enjoy today. Hope everyone else is having a nice day too.
1 comment:
The 'Stang's name is Frieda??? Umm... that's kinda a strange name for a car. I just call the Harley, Bitch! LOL!!! And I got some new gadgets added on to it since dh has been gone, so he can't complain that I moved it!
And drive that damn 'Stang, woman!!! It needs to get out and get the fuel running through it's lines and all that kind of stuff... just take it out!
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